Anonymous asked: I am a trans man who is interested in making porn beyond amateur xtube type stuff (either in front of or behind the camera, I have experience with shooting/lighting). I'm not sure if it's the right job/career move for me. How did you know, or how did you figure out that porn was the right fit for you? How would you advise somebody considering this?
To be completely honest, having a career as a trans guy porn performer is nearly impossible. Even I hesitate to call my work in porn a career and I also have day jobs outside of porn. Most porn performers who are not trans also have a tough time making it in the industry, this is no longer the 90s and porn does not make the same kind of sustainable money it did two decades ago.
Trans guy porn performers on average might get one scene per company that shoots trans guys a year, and that is a rather generous estimate. I’d encourage you to consider what interests you about being in porn and think about your goals. The prospect of being paid for sex? Getting to meet and have sex with famous people? A buttplug trophy? 10000k twitter/instagram/tumblr followers?
Social media is a beast! Be prepared for your explicit full frontal images to be online and beyond your control of who can have access to it, including family members and prospective future employers. Most porn performers I know perform in porn for a few years before they move on to something else. Have a plan b in case it does not go the way you hope.
That said, it can be really fun and you can have really great and transformative life experiences through porn. It can teach you a lot about yourself and your sexuality, and you can meet some really amazing people. I have friends that I will probably have for the rest of my life that I have met through my work in porn. I get letters from people almost every day telling me how much they love the porn I make and how it has positively impacted their lives and that makes all the challenging aspects of porn worth it. YMMV. <3
Anonymous asked: pt 1) This is probably goin to be a pointless message but I love this boy. A lot more than I should considering he's my best friend. He knows I do, and sometimes I think he feels the same way, but he's one of those people that never says how they feel/is incredibly hard to read. We're both trans dudes and he's a lot more uncomfortable and reserved about being trans than I am. Sometimes I want to kiss him when he gets close to my face, but he'd probably punch me due to surprise. I don't know what
pt 2) to do and actually being in love with someone that you can’t even hold in the not-friend ways because of reasons that you can’t even control is a real pain in the ass and my heart is ridiculous.
Oh honey! I have been on many sides of the not emotionally available too emotionally available continuum and adding trans trauma on top of that is a complicated place to be. I feel for you, I really do. It sounds like you are in two different places. Have you told him how you feel? If it’s important to you to maintain your friendship with him, I’d weigh the pros and cons of disrupting your friendship for the pursuit of something more. Otherwise enjoy the connection that you currently have with him, but if it’s too painful to not have more of a romantic connection I’d take some space. Good luck!
Dex Hardlove showing off his fur and muscles against the ivy
Cute photo from a shoot I did with Amy Bexxx in NYC, who’s ready for a ride? ;)